Job at the FBI (bad bad joke) ;)

9

The FBI had an opening for an assassin. After all the background checks, interviews and testing were finished, there were 3 finalists; two men and a woman.

For the final test, the FBI agents took one of the men to a large metal door and handed him a gun.

‘We must know that you will follow your instructions no matter what the circumstances. Inside the room you will find your wife sitting in a chair .. . . Kill her!!’

The man said, ‘You can’t be serious. I could never shoot my wife.’

The agent said, ‘Then you’re not the right man for this job. Take your wife and go home.’

The second man was given the same instructions. He took the gun and went into the room. All was quiet for about 5 minutes. The man came out with tears in his eyes, ‘I tried, but I can’t kill my wife.’

The agent said, ‘You don’t have what it takes. Take your wife and go home.’

Finally, it was the woman’s turn. She was given the same instructions, to kill her husband.

She took the gun and went into the room.

Shots were heard, one after another.

They heard screaming, crashing, banging on the walls.

After a few minutes, all was quiet…………

The door opened slowly and there stood the woman, wiping the sweat from her brow.

‘This gun is loaded with blanks’ she said, ‘I had to beat him to death with the chair.

MORAL: Women are…..you know…. Don’t….. no…. NEVER mess with them. 😀

****************************************************************

What a racist joke. I don’t like it, I don’t like it at all. I really don’t like it.  😉

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Ladies and Lads … Attention please!!

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I found something interesting somewhere on internet.

WOMAN has MAN in it .

SHE has HE in it.

Mrs. Has Mr. In it.

LADY has LAD in it.

MISTERESS has MISTER in it.

MADAM has ADAM in it.

HOSTESS has HOST in it.

FEMALE has MALE in it

……

….

..

.

Any comments, girls? (and boys too if they have stopped grinning 😀 )

Cheers

Different things again (or same?) [a sad sequel]

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[Sad] part 1:

Sunday: Me and my friend were sitting in the garden at Bal Gandharv Chitramandir, Pune. We were sitting there chatting. My friend (a girl) suddenly went silent and started glaring at somebody behind me. On asking she said in very low voice,” That girl is looking at us and she is errr.. smiling weirdly a little!”. I smirked and turned to look while my friend awkwardly continued,” She seems a bit …. lost.” Surely that girl was lost in thoughts because she didn’t notice us looking at her. She was now staring at nowhere and a kinda weird smile was plastered on her face. And suddenly a hot(probably) tear rolled out that unknown girls eye and second eye copied its partner. Tears started streaming out her eyes and she was still like a statue. Unable to strain her face from showing real emotions, she threw it in her hands and started crying silently.

I turned to my friend and asked her to stop looking at her. But she was no more looking at that girl. Now it was her turn to start being weird, I guessed.

[Not much sad] part 2:

My guess was not that good as it is always. My friend was merely thinking about some related things came to her mind. “May be she has installed the “related posts feature” wordpress introduced few days ago”, I thought.
“What can be her problem?”, I was ready for this question and I opened my mouth to retort when she continued, “Ok, whatever her problem is, why don’t she just go home and cry in her bed? Why she is sitting here in a public place like this where almost everyone comes to enjoy evenings?”
Now, I was wondering with same question in my mind. There were couples all over the place, children playing in lawn, grandmas chatting loudly, grandpas observing nearby couples activities, mummy’s sitting with amused expressions, Bhelwala shouting to attract customers, youngsters looking at couples who sit very closely with curious looks and many more. Now, why the hell that girl was sitting in couples corner of garden ALONE?

I don’t think we need an expert to answer. Heartbreak is obvious one but there are many important things in life that losing a boyfriend. may be she had a row with her mother and she shouted something serious. Obviously girl can not sit and cry at home which will make her mother more angry. Or there was something really bad happening with her which she found impossible to tell anybody about. We can never know. life is not that simple as it seems. Or it is.

[Just my thoughts] Part 3:

Our meeting abruptly ended as my friend started remembering how she used to cry silently in nights when she was stuck at an awful place (awful = no means of contact with me) and her parents never noticed. I thought leaving the place a good idea but for a moment I though of going and trying consoling the girl. She was thinking same and she believed that my great communication abilities towards girls can help me here. I hesitated for a minute or so and then decided against it. What if that girl was a … I am not accusing or doubting, but for a second I thought what if she is a prostitute who came there just to relieve herself from mental strain. This thought stopped me in tracks. I decided and told my friend firmly,”No, we are not going to disturb her. And don’t offer her water either.” I continued as she took out water bottle.

I don’t know what made me not to console her. I usually work on my instincts. And they have never ever failed me. I still think it was a wise decision.

Opinions, thoughts, claims, blames, suggestions, and much more expected from YOU GUYS.